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2018-12-27 00:00:00 (UTC)

Thursday, December 27th

It is 8:28PM to be exact. It was cold and wet on Christmas day. It lightly rained. Grey skies and low wind. I woke up with mother cooking in the kitchen. She made a macaroni salad, baked a cake, and steamed suman. They had to leave in the afternoon for Los Angeles to attend Aunt V.'s party. I left for work with my ugly sweater and red scrub pants, an ensemble which E.L. loved. I stopped over his place before work. He is off his anti-depressant; he said. Saw m my baby girl S. whom I miss very much at this moment. Poor dog has to stay at E.L.'s while I work my busy schedule, doing sixteen hours and nocturnal shifts. At least my baby girl has a playmate at E.L.'s-- his newly adopted dog, L., who is rowdy, watchful and territorial. Anyhow, so to T.O.T. after stopping by at E.L.'s to pick up the small party tray of vegetable pad thai I ordered two hours prior, though, to my chagrin, I had to wait for about fifteen minutes amidst a crowd before I got my order ready. So to work, and I must say never had there been a more fun day at work. We had a potluck party and the food was scrumptious. Then there was the white elephant gift exchange. It would be a bore to get into the minutiae of the work-party but in the end I had a three set of serving bowls as a present which I am happy with.
The next day I had to wake up at 6AM for I had to go to work at MH. I slept for about five hours the night before. I worked in the back station which I found difficult because I was unfamiliar with it. I had to pack a sacral wound on one patient and clean and dress a venous ulcer on another. C.F. and R.P. were there. I learned from the patient A.N. that my old fling, my old crush, J. is now dating a cleaning lady's daughter, whose name and face I don't even know. But it did not come as surprise to me that I did not feel anything about the news. Then to APA to work PM shift. By the way, all throughout the day I had been taking 1 tsp of promethazine with codeine every four hours as needed for my cough which has gotten so much better today. Nevertheless, I was extremely tired after work that I showered and crashed to bed immediately. I looked at my bed upon coming home and never had the sight of it been more inviting and comforting, like a boon, like a sanctuary, stationary and unchanging, amidst a chaotic and changing world. Anyhow, I slept for about twelve hours, waking up about 1PM this afternoon. As for today, I did laundry; organized; potted the indoor plant which E.L. gave me as a thoughtful present for Christmas. E.L. sent me text messages. He said he was depressed; has crying spells. He told me he woke up at around 4AM wide awake feeling as if there was no one around in life, and wishing I was there close to him. "I love and care about you," I told him, "you are one of the most important people I have in my life." He told me how it meant a lot to hear that from me. He went to see Y. in Tijuana mid-afternoon. "I need to get out of this effing house," his text message read. Late in the afternoon, father and I went to S.C. to cash out his hundred dollar winning from a two-dollar scratch. The cashier lady funny and vibrant. Saw R.A. from work in the parking lot, to whom I exchanged a few words of curtsies.Then we went to Target to buy groceries; a substantial crowd out there. Weather cold, and the sun shone intermittently among tufts of grayish white clouds. So to home. I am to work nocturnal shift tonight at MH. My sideline at MH will pay off the half a grand I owe in one of my credit cards. One spends a lot more money than usual during the holidays.