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2018-12-05 05:53:27 (UTC)

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My second day off. My parents arrived at 10:30 this morning as I was reading VW's D on the velvet couch, with Mozart station on Pandora playing in the background. They haven't been home since they left for P. yesterday afternoon. They slept on the car; so they said; lost $25. I am taking their word for it. The truth is, they at their age can do whatever they please. I, as their son, feel that I should not be the one to dictate their behaviors and choices, though I will always remain to be loving and supportive of them. I heated up the ragu bolognese for us to have for lunch. We visited consignment classic stores, one on H. street, and the other one on K., in hopes of buying a painting for the living room wall. But we didn't like the stores. They reeked a certain moldy antiquity about them, as if they harbored the dust and life of the people who previously owned them. "I'd rather buy something new," mother said, to which I agreed. To be sure, we left both stores without any purchase, feeling disappointed, as if we've wasted our time. Not to mention how we got lost trying to find the stores and the heavy traffic on our way home. Stopped at See's Candies and bought a box of assorted chocolate. I went to Big 5 Sporting Goods and bought nothing. The sweatpants cost $45. Father and mother went to Big Lots. So to home. We took a rest for a couple of hours, then we went to Petco for S.'s Science Diet. (S. the dog by the way came with us in all our trips). Then to Ross which was stuffy, and felt like a thrift store. Filled with Mexicans. I was going to buy two wooden cutting boards but, seeing the long line of customers with carts full, decided against it. I told this information to mother, who at that time had a bra, jeans, etc. on her hands, and she ended up propping the items on a corner and we both walked out of the store, purchaseless. Father and S. waited in the car. Back to home. Mother cooked chicken to bring with her for her work these upcoming four days. She is to leave in the morning. Her and father are to wake up early, around 6am, to get to S.B. by 9am. I shopped sweaters and sweatpants at, in lieu of anticipating classroom attires. Bought Evelom Dynaspot at Sephora. Joined Crunch Fitness. I plan on going to the gym in the morning after four months hiatus. My knees at times ache dully. I feel as if I've lost a bit of sensation on the skin on the side of my left leg after a whole night of sex with C.C. two months ago. E.L. leaving for Guadalajara tomorrow. He is to have his crosslinking eye surgery there; will be there until the 15th. He has been texting me today. He invited me for dinner at his place which I didn't go to, partly because I felt tired after going to the consignment stores, and partly because I was not motivated to spend time with him just yet. Money runs tightly. I won't be paid until the 10th.
My favorite show during my teen years, I googled America's Next Top Model to see if there will be a new season any time soon. Rather, different news relating to the show appeared. Jael Straus died at 34 on hospice after battling with aggressive breast cancer. Amanda Swafford toothless and penniless. And how they were all at one time beautiful, admired, famous. All this gave off a strange feeling how life, with its undeniable impermanence, is capricious, fickle. That no matter how we think and like that we have control...but to some extent I think we do, but the chances in the river of life to which we are all flung to, and ends in all our termination; death. But I must stop.