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The Life Of "Mars".
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2016-11-22 13:57:10 (UTC)

Praise The Lord

Tuesday 22nd November, 2016

Way back in year seven sometime during term two or three I got put into a camp because my mom wanted me to go out and have fun, so I got put into this religious camp that was somewhere down South. I can't remember exactly where it was. I went back there in year eight too.

I just wanna state this; I'm not a religious person. When I was little I used to believe in God, I mean even in year eight I still did I guess. But I was young then and I've learned to think for myself. That's not to say I have any ill will or disliking to anyone who is religious. I completely understand their thinking and reasons. I just personally don't see it, which is kind of weird when you think about it right? I mean my mom, the rest of my family, every foster parent I've had, a lot of my past friends and their families, have all been religious. I thought I would of been influenced more, but I suppose not. That's not me saying there aren't some dumb, hot-headed religious people either. I've seen some real dumb ass physco shit from some of em, but I like to blame the person, not the religion.

When I arrived there I was alone at these docks because the camp was on this beach that you had to boat to. I didn't know a single kid either and since I was so far out of town and there were kids who all knew each other because they went to the same school, I was just a stranger. I remember I wanted to try and get better at making friends with people so I took all the courage I had and said hi to one of the camp guidance people. And we talked for a little and after I felt pretty pleased with myself that I did that.

The boat ride was kind of annoying I guess, I sat next to this one kid and tried to say hi and he pretty much ignored me which kinda took down my will to try and talk to anybody else.

I can't remember a whole lot from what happened when we arrived at the camp. I'm pretty sure we were given a welcoming by the two owners of the camp, who were also both married. They set out the rules, what kind of things we would be doing, gave us a tour, and gave us all a chance to mingle among ourselves.

There was some kid who I hit it off with almost instantly. I can barely remember him or what he looks like. But he was a chill dude. I think me and him were going to be cabin buddies together because each cabin was small and had only two beds. But he had to change last minute because one of his friends from school who was there with him started crying because he didn't get to be with his friend. I got put with this other kid, I can't remember his name either but I know he was this nerdy dude with glasses.

I didn't really like the nerdy dude, I felt like he tried to intimidate me for some reason. He'd always try and tell me stories about how badly he beat up kids at school or he'd say things like "I could beat you up right now if I wanted to." I didn't really believe him, I mean he was some skinny scrawny kid with glasses. I think we only had one good night together where we talked about girls.

We were all split up into about three or four different groups, where we'd all do different activities each day in kind of a circle process. And me and the chill kid were placed into different groups so we didn't really see each other a whole lot except during breaks or walking over to new activities. I didn't really have any friends in my group.

We'd get up and have breakfast, lunch and dinner and then after we'd go to these little hour things where we'd talk about God and Jesus and then we'd go to bed. I actually liked doing that, the vibe was pretty cool. I think the idea of somebody strong and powerful looking out for you and loving for you is really comforting. Somebody who can help you with all your problems. The idea of salvation after death, it's all really nice. And I was pretty happy about it. But these days well I don't see it as logical or realistic. There are so many contradictions. And I think that a lot of these people in a way, are scared. These ideas bring them comfort and happiness like it once did to me, and there's nothing wrong with that.

I can't remember a whole lot of the activities that we did. I know that one time before bed the leader of our group, because we had those, was reading us stuff from the Bible, while telling us this story. I think it went along the lines of some dude who talked to God and made some bet with these native dudes who had their own God for both groups to sit on a pile of hay or something. And the thing was whoever was right about their God, their God would ignite the hay and kill the people. And the dude with God won, while the other group was burnt to a crisp.

I didn't really think too much of it, but now if somebody were to tell me that story again as I am now in some way to try and prove how mighty God is I think I would challenge them. This story alone gives me so much shit to bring up about the contradictions that exist with well Christianity. God supposedly gave us free will, correct? He wanted us to be able to choose for us to believe in him or not, at least that is what I was told growing up. So for him to then burn a group of people who have used their free will to think of something else of their own ideals and creation, they are punished with a painful death. Forgiving your enemy is another part of the Bible, is it not? I don't see any forgiveness in this story. I mean there's nothing forgiving about burning someone alive. I could go more in depth here if I wanted to. I could bring up that fact that if God is omnipresent then the ideas of different God's shouldn't even exist in other cultures as he would of just given the ideas to them like he did to those in Israel. But I don't want to get too much into a religious rant when this is supposed to be a story. I'll save that for another day.

The last day I can't remember too much about either, I think the chill kid made a girlfriend on that camp and he came to me of all people asking for advice about it. Heh, I don't know what I told him other then that cheesy like "just be yourself." I wonder what he's doing now or what he's been through since.

I remember when I came back home for a good two weeks I had all the Jesus songs stuck in my head and I couldn't help but sing them. I think one went like "Your love is like a beetroot stain, it never ever goes away, from meeeeeee." I'd try to sing that song whenever I got sad too because I guess it would give me a sense of comfort.

The second time I went back to that camp in year eight I really didn't like it. There were a group of kids who were kinda dicks to me. There was this one kid who I had to bunk with and I really didn't like him either. I felt pretty sad too because that group of kids who were dicks to me tried to move into my cabin and make me switch cabins. I didn't switch luckily.

I guess there were parts of the camp that were pretty fun, the owners were really the nice, the food was good. The kids, eh I didn't really get along with most of em or I felt indifferent to them. It was bloody cold there too. Especially in the mornings.

Well I guess I'm going to end it off here tonight.
-Peace, Mars.